A month before I turned 34, life threw me into a whole new chapter, and it started with a bang (or should I say... a slap!). I’d joined a Facebook group for women to share information about the men they were dating. I was just casual scrolling, really. Then bam I found my partner in there. Yep, my man, front and center in someone else's post. Shocked was an understatement. I messaged the woman who posted, and she kindly (or brutally?) sent me videos of the two of them. That was all the confirmation I needed. I confronted him. Classic Aries Sun style and let’s just say I channeled my inner Mars and made my disappointment very clear. I went full rage mode. No regrets.
But here's where it gets wild. every 12 years, the zodiac wheel turns full circle, and we repeat life themes with new wisdom. When I was 22, I went through something eerily similar. A friend sent me Facebook photos of my ex cuddled up with another girl in a club. Déjà vu, right? So once again, social media came through as the cosmic messenger. #FacebookForTheWin
The difference? At 22, I was emotionally overwhelmed and deeply hurt. At 34, I was already gone emotionally. I’d been planning my exit long before the drama hit. So when it did, I just kept it moving. Within no time, I was dating again and feeling alive. First, there was the Cancer (great until he fumbled the bag), then came the Sagittarius (pure cosmic compatibility). But deep down, I knew this year was about me. It was about freedom, fun, and getting back to me.
And that’s where astrology steps in. My 34th year was ruled by the 11th house. a space of liberation, friendships, dreams, community, and independence. My Sun is exalted in Aries in that very house, and with Mars as my time lord, things were bound to be fiery and fierce. My Mars sits in my 9th house in Aquarius. The sign of freedom, rebellion, and breaking out of boxes. And that’s exactly what I did. I broke free.
I met a vibrant Leo friend who reintroduced me to joy, dancing, flirting and laughter. The things I hadn’t realized I’d been missing. For the first time in a long time, I was having fun again. Great sex, magnetic energy, and most importantly, I felt alive. Honestly? It was giving “How Stella Got Her Groove Back.” I hadn’t realised how much my ex had energetically weighed me down until he was gone.
Of course, all this freedom didn’t sit well with him, but this time, it wasn’t about him. It was about everything I had suppressed for years. My needs. My voice. My joy. Mars may rule anger, but in Aquarius and with the 11th house activated, it was all about cutting cords to reclaim my truth and independence.
That year also brought a big shift: I moved. My son and I left our old home and returned to my flat. A space I once saw as a downgrade. But with love and intention, I transformed it into a sanctuary. It’s beautiful now. It’s ours. And most importantly, it’s where I began again.
Looking back, my 35th year has been worlds apart from my 22nd. At 22, I was depressed, emotionally unstable, and unsure of myself. Still, I accomplished huge things. I got my driver’s license, landed a job in social housing, and moved out on my own. The seeds were planted back then. And now, at 34–35, it feels like those seeds are finally blooming. Thriving business, self sufficient, confident, self aware and independent. Major shifts happened both times, but this time, I had the self-awareness and strength to navigate it with clarity and power.
Oh, and yes! Of course he was a Gemini. Selling me dreams with that silver tongue. But guess what? I’m not buying anymore. I’ve got bigger dreams now my own and they’re finally coming true.
